Starlines 1 (Repeat) Oct 19-Oct 25, 2019

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Oct 18th, 2019

I’ve been disinclined to go back to meditation. It’s just too faint to believe. There’s little certainty and certainly – no closure. Then I was shown it would be advantageous to go to TMI. In the last two years I’ve really had no thought of going back there; even now I’m not interested in going. There are the pointed issues and I’m not sure the answers to those questions will come even at TMI, but now I guess I have to go to know one way or the other.

Here I sit in a motel room waiting for my flight early tomorrow. Six hundred channels of shit on the TV. What a complete waste. I already miss being back in the mountains where no one bothers me with the daily bullshit of human life. I think going to TMI is a mistake.

Oct 25th 2019

Week later: Just return-landed; back in my motel room. Why I went to TMI I have no idea; guess i was wrong; no surprise there. Now things are even worse. It is impossible.

Starlines 1 (Repeat) Oct 19-Oct 25, 2019

Generally I did not follow the course group session tasks as I did not come here for the course, although I did limit myself to reside in the respective focus levels of the student sessions.

Saturday night: Reset focus level 10-21: nothing other then sustain the whole campus.

Sunday AM Session 1: nothing

Sunday AM Session 2: nothing

Sunday PM Late Afternoon Session 1: still nothing

Sunday PM Late Afternoon Session 2: nothing

Sunday Evening: Introduction to Voyager 8: nothing at all

Monday Night: The Students 1st Introduction to Focus 42

Finally a level where it feels like home to me. Rather then go with the students to do the ‘designated group activity’ I went to Alpha Squared to see Tellaidian. I went there on my own without the group energy; so sue me.

Arriving at Tellaidian’s lounge/conference room I found it was hard to consolidate but I did find Tellaidian who immediately said to me, “Force! Force your presence to be here”. As I exerted my will for some moments I found I was able to more firmly connect to F42.

When I was more fully ‘arrived’, so to speak, Tellaidian turned to leave and so I follow him. We drift out to meet his three associates to form the Ring ¹. Connecting we raised energy together and we stayed in that process circulating energy for a long time. Nothing else happened and after awhile I returned.

Tuesday AM: Session 2 (Focus 42)

Again abandoning the group energy exercise, I went to my suite at AS as my business is largely here. When I entered my room I found a figure waiting.

It’s difficult to describe this individual but I immediately knew what it was. I knew it was a facilitator there to represent the Ancients, but it is a simple matter for the Ancients to speak to me so why send a facilitator I wondered?

How to describe it? The figure was taller then myself, conical, and it appeared elaborate in presentation; appearing as some sort of official, draped in fine garments with stole and adorning vestments. This was similar to how an archbishop might appear for some formal ceremony requiring white. But to be clear – it did not look like an archbishop at all. I offer this only to allude to the formal ceremonial appearance of this individual.

It immediately directed me to follow as it left the room and we proceeded down the hall to the observation lounge, not far from my suite. When we got there the facilitator turn around to face me directly. I believe it was making a formal introductory greeting as it pronounced, “We are with you. You are always with us. We are here”. I acknowledged its statement.

After a pause this figure announced as if stating an edict, “It is not yet time”. Receiving that statement – a moment later the facilitator disappeared. Considering this terse message I sat down in the observation lounge to meditate there, or here.

After a moment or so I became aware of Tellaidian and so I turned to look and saw him walking down the hallway toward me as I sat in the observation lounge. When he arrived he said, “Striving you do”. “Yes”, I answered. He continued, “You are filled with questions”, as he reached out and touching my wrist lightly he said , “Look”.

So I looked forward out the observation lounge’s window. In space I saw a funnel of light appeared forming an conical entrance. I looked back at Tellaidian and asked, “a concourse”? “Yes”, he answered as he proceeded to walk across the lounge and directed me to follow him out of AS.

We drifted in a short distance and I noticed Tellaidian stopped. I was a couple paces ahead of him when I noticed this. As I looked at him he directed me to continue and so I drifted further in. I saw as if picture frames of recent times of history as if each picture was an entrance to a chapter of time. Why see this in a concourse I wondered?

I stopped unwilling to proceed further without some explanation and called out, “Why am I here”? In reply I heard, “We will show you futures”. Receiving no more explanation then that I proceeded no further. However, I was there a long time. Later I became deeply tired and soon phased back per the session narration instructions, finally escaping the exhaustion.

Tuesday AM 3rd session: Student Introduction to the Alpha Squared and the Memory Room Chair (F42).

This session is the students’ introduction to Alpha Squared (AS) and the Memory Rooms. I went directly to AS without group energy intending to observe the students enter the facility below in the main lobby. I consolidate at my suite’s focus 42 mnemonic, turned around and leaned over the hall’s railing looking down. No one was there yet.

As I waited, watching the lobby below, something to my right caught my eye or I knew to look. When I turned I saw Anosh approaching me. She was walking down the right hallway toward me from one of the ship’s gantries I believe, near the observation lounge.

She was so different from when we first met². Before she was highly composed, business-like, a creature free of any internal conflict, having a discipled mind of high intuition; not withstanding her beauty.

Now, her face was radiant with a bright smile exuding familiarity and she was not wearing some hospital gown to conceal herself as during our third meeting³. She was wearing her skin-tight jump suit that seems like some light-blue spandex having a slight fuzzy surface. I‘ve only seen her smile a couple times before, and now this smile was radiant as if it would never fade. This was itself remarkable – radiant happiness – a rare thing to see anywhere.

But then of greater surprise, she quickly came to my side, cuddling against me warmly, pressing me into direct contact with the amorous she projected when we first met. What she was feeling was unmistakable and so was what I was feeling … to finally be together.

She rested her hand on my forearm as she looked directly into my eyes. We were face to face. I took her hand and together we leaned over the railing looking down at the lobby waiting to see the new students arrive.

While waiting I wondered, how can this be? None-the-less I was completely overtaken by Anosh’s direct presence which I welcomed fully without hesitation. Now I was not intimidate by her as when we first met. The comfort of her is – it is something I have never remotely felt or ever imagined in my life; a feeling as strong and as clear as this – to be together in complete joy.

Moments later Atur arrived from the other side of the station. It is always so very good to see him. He came to stand on my left and leaned over the rail to also watch the hall below as he rested his hand on my right shoulder. We were all together again, as it should be. I felt the camaraderie of these friends and of course, the ever-present affectionate comfort of Anosh being with me. I have never known what affection is until now.

After awhile we saw the students straggling in dispersed across the lobby as they milled toward the main lifts. They were proceeding per the narration to find their respective suites.

I turn from my friends to excuse myself as I enter my suite and proceeded to access my memory room. I greeted the chair operators and after climbing into the chair – an instant later – I was gone.

Finding myself in an empty context I consider my most important question. I immediately considered the pointed matter about the Wise One but I decided more important than that now was the question regarding the truth of Anosh. How can this be true? How can it possibly be, at all?

I call out to the space, “Is it true, what I suspect is happening between me and Anosh, the Pleiadian female”? After a pause something replied, “It is not yet time for you to know”. Of course. Why am I not surprised.

Then feeling I had a good connection and there was still time I reconsider and called out the pointed issue, “How is it possible for the Wise One to endorse the falsehood of the chamberlain’s words”? Immediately the room responded with remarkable clarity, “To create perplexity … By giving you both the true and the false, this creates perplexity. Out of perplexity arises decisive purpose”⁴.

Understanding that but still having no closure I decide to leave the memory room. There are no other questions I will bother with. Stepping out of the memory room, back into my suite I found Tellaidian waiting for me.

“Answers you have”, he queried? “Not fully – but I understand the answers I received now”, I replied. With some gesture, I don’t know maybe something like a shrug, Tellaidian turned and left.

For some moments I remained alone contemplating the answers I was given and then Anosh step into my suite’s open doorway. I saw her standing there waiting for me; her radiant smile, and her sensuous beauty was unmistakable. It was a joy to be with her again. I went to join her and together we walked down the hall to the observation lounge where we went to sit together. Who needs those TMI group energy tasks?

After a time I had to return to my SP27 and so I offer a goodbye to Anosh. Once in my SP I walked slowly to the end of my table and turned to look out my window. Raphael became more apparent. Together he and I looked out the window as a dragon swooped by. I watched it glide away on the rising air-currents of the hanging valley. Is it truly a dragon I wondered?

{There are considerable notes about this interesting creative force that chooses the symbolic representation of dragons but I haven’t collected them all into one reading yet. Sorry again}

Tuesday Late Afternoon Session (F42)

I no longer gave attention to what the students were doing but in this session I did go to Voyager 8 as they were assigned and once there I saw the same alien craft that I’ve met here other times; seemed clear enough to believe so I immediately left V8.

Once in the craft it was just so good to be with these pilots again. I can’t tell whether they’re the same pilots; they look too alien to tell them apart, but I’ve come to really like this species – whatever they are. I just like being with them.

They nosed the craft down and arc’d into a gently dive, but what does down mean here? After a time we pulled up is how I would describe it and soon I began to see Sa-Tash’s base planet.

There was a lot of white reflective clouds but this time I could see the light tan-orange color of the surface, at least below that part of the clouds I could see through. It was nice to look at it as our final approach took some time.

I enjoyed a soft landing. In previous notes these guys are daredevil acrobatic pilots and provide one hell of a ride.

I saw Sa-Tash⁵ waiting for me on the landing area and also with him … was Atur and Anosh. We greeted warmly as Sa-Tash is also one my fondest associations; a being who’s goodness is readily apparent. We walked together and entered the same hallway I’ve been in before. Sa-Tash led us to the first conference room on the left as in the past.

He went to sit on the opposite side of the table from me while Anosh sat down directly on my left close to me and Atur on her left. Anosh rested her hand on my left forearm. Then Sa-Tash, in a very relax manner said, “We wanted to assure you. We know this is not enough, but we thought you needed time off so we brought you here to be with us.

It was so good to be back; I could cry writing about it now. The feeling of these friends – strong friends of mine and we all – or I – can relax now, at least for a bit.

Then the view screen descended from the ceiling and I studied the face of a green alien with yellow-green eyes; so hard to describe. It appeared that Sa-Tash was taking a call. When he completely the VCOM he turned his attention back to us as the view screen retracted, and we all just hung-out together; is what I would call it.

After awhile, even though Atur and Sa-Tash were there, concerned I might not see Anosh again for a long time and having the opportunity to ask I turned to her saying, “Anosh I need to ask you….”,

Instantly she interrupted me saying, “When our hearts first met I knew – I could not turn away from you”. I answered, “Anosh – I too – cannot turn from you”.

We said nothing more. Anosh’s words are always precise and complete; there was nothing more we needed to say. We both knew each other’s feelings⁶.

After a long time Sa-Tash stood up; guess it was time to go. We filed out down the hall to the flight deck and said our goodbyes. I climbed into the small craft and we left with a gentle lift. I should say it’s not that I object to the acrobatics these guys like to pull, I just want some warning when there gonna do it.

We approached V8 but I decide to phase back to my SP27 rather then go to Voyager. I wandered back to my SP as usual and seeing Raphael I said to him, “I just don’t know what to do with [all] this”. He put his hand on my left shoulder saying nothing and we looked out the window together as usual. Soon I left.

Tuesday Evening F42 Free Flow Session

I got to my SP27 and went to my chair at the end of the table; thinking to sit here for awhile figuring things out. But then I was surprised to see the Gatekeeper walk in through my doorway as I generally leave the door open as a welcoming gesture. We have not met in a very long time.

I stood up and offered him my chair but he said, “No. That is your chair. I will sit here”, as he proceeded to sit down in the chair to my left that faces the cave’s crack window. I sat down; the open air view to my right. Abruptly Raphael personified stepping up closer to the right edge of the table; his back to the window, appearing to be there to heed the conversation.

As we sat the Gatekeeper looked at me and said, “You must [learn to] rest”⁷. I answered, “I know – but I can’t cease striving with this incompleteness”. We sat together a long time. After that he again instructed me saying strongly, “Rest”. Then he got up and walk out leaving me alone with Raphael. I sat there thinking for a few moments and then phased on to AS.

As I consolidated at my F42 mnemonic I found Anosh waiting for me. She immediately threw her arms around my neck hugging me. I muttered, “Anosh, the only time I have rest, is with you”. She answered, “I am here”. After a few moments I explained I needed to visit Tellaidian for awhile and departed.

Walking into Tellaidian’s conference lounge I was surprise by the crowd there (not TMI students). I said, “Master Tellaidian, you have many students”, “Yes!”, he answered. I wasn’t sure if he was please by this or not.

Then abruptly, as if frustrated by the number of students, he blurted out to me, “YOU go teach”, and I answered him saying, “I can’t”. But he insisted, “You can”. I retorted, “Master Tellaidian, I cannot teach your students!”, and Tellaidian strongly said, “….. and do not think you fail”! After a time of watching Tellaidian stare at me, waiting for me to obey him, I agreed to try.

I wandered over to two – aliens; can’t even describe them other then I”ll say, they were very short, oblong, and pale with small features. First I sat down on the floor so we would be about the same height. Next I showed them how to raise the light. Once they could do that I showed them how to give the energy to the next individual as they receive the energy from the other. After a while we had that going between the three of us. I had them speed up – keep trying – to maintain a continuous circulation among us; build the circulation of energy.

When they did that I stepped out of the ring letting the two aliens circulate on their own. I called the Ancients requesting they allow these two access to the Root as I lifted these two individuals above me, sustaining them. I kept them there, sustained, and after a long time I brought them down. When the light diminished I noticed Tellaidian was standing next to us watching as he said to me, “See – You [do] teach good”.

After this Tellaidian and I left his lounge walking together down the left hallway for a break. My suite is along the right hallway from Tellaidian’s lounge with the main lobby between but below the two halls.

As we strolled I said to him, “I don’t know how to cease striving and I don’t know what I feel”, to which Tellaidian retorted, “You feel her (Anosh) well”, and I laughed but then I was unclear regarding his approval of this matter. Did he disapprove? When we neared the forward observation lounge on our level he turned around and went back to his conference room after our brief visit.

As I neared the observation lounge’s entrance I saw Anosh walking down the other hallway from the gantry area toward me. She is perfection in feminine humanoid form and elevated mind.

After a time together she told me she must leave and we said farewell to each other. As she turn and walked away, heading toward the gantry area, the narration started the return but I wasn’t going back. I’m not going back yet I decided, so I ignored the narration and the hemi-sync signal pulling at me. I stayed in F42 and after a very long time I finally did go back.

Wednesday AM (only session)

I wondered if there was some thought or understanding that is key for me to consider. I went to my SP27 which is standard as I always stop in to check whether my attention is needed here (F27). Walking across my portico a large dragon appeared facing me on my left as it hover above the hanging valley. It said nothing and without it being clearer I disregarded the vision and enter my SP; from here I continued on (to F42).

Once again at AS I found Tellaidian waiting and we continued our conversation, “Confliction you are”, he stated. “Yes”, I answered, “I can find no balance, no resolution. Yes. Confliction it is”. Responding he added, “That is the nature of that. You are not surprise”? “You are correct [I am not surprised]”, I answer him.

Then I went to my Memory Room and inquired regarding my question; nothing happened – frustrating. But there was a glimmer and I saw the Great Hall or parthenon in the distance (F42-F49+). I saw it faintly and then I saw the One who I know as The Presence of the Light⁸. Could it be her?!

She turned away and by force of will I pursued Her just as She entered the Hall’s dark interior – but She was gone beyond me.

Standing alone on the Great Hall’s portico I sense a powerful presence and I wonder for a moment whether it was the Wise One – then I will have my pointed discussion I thought, but it was not Him.

Then something powerful spoke to me, “I am your [Ancient] father”, and I turned directly to face it. “You need to trust Us”, the Ancient⁹ stated.

“Trust?”, I asked adding, “Repeated misery and injury You gave me”?

“And We have always healed you”, It retorted to which I answer, “That is true [not without scars]”, I acknowledged.

“How do I actually know You …. [That] What You say [is true]?”, I challenged.

“This [also] is a matter of trust”, He answered. “What validation have You offered [unlike the First Ones]? None!”, I said.

“It is a matter of trust [despite perplexity]. The solution to your confliction [We gave you] arises through trust”, He explained.

To be honest, I was satisfied by His answer; recognizing its pertinence. I understood this is the crux of the matter, or one of them; whether I like it or not. What He says is clearly correct. Somehow I know this.

And then I left His presence as we said nothing more to each other. I can’t see or find the way through this and I can’t find the ability in myself to make this leap.

Wednesday Afternoon Session 2 (Students intro to F49)

Still ignoring the group lessons and energy stuff I went to my SP in F27. As I consolidate on my portico, then walking toward my SP doorway, a huge dragon landed heavily on my left crushing the buttress shoulder of my portico’s ledge which is a flat slab feature. This definitely got my attention.

It was the same sleek black dragon I been seeing – a celestial dragon. I wondered at this surprised by its size as it outstretched a wing to me commanding, “Come with me”. Then we left.

With strong thrusts it headed nearly straight up but the ascent was gentle.. Soon we entered the darkness above the Earth and joined the dragon armada; at the place where they fly together into the Sunrise; where it is unchanging.

I called to this creature, “Why have you brought me here to be with you [and the others]”?

“So you would know us”, it answered and then it pulled up heading straight upward leaving the armada.

In black space I noticed other celestial dragons; one on our right – a white dragon and there was another one on our left – a red dragon. I noticed there were others in the distance and as we turned taking a new direction I saw the large bright light of our star.

After a time it was clear we were heading directly to the Sun. We traveled longer as the star was getting much bigger, filling my perception. And then we plunge right into its surface as if merely diving into a pool of water for the dragon. “Where are we”? I asked. “Your Sun”, it answered. “Why are we here [inside]”, I added? It answered directly, “So you know…..”.

As we continue to fly through the Sun below us I saw writhing in great bunches, dragons appearing hot-white with wing shaped splashes of color in shades of firey orange or burnt reds; their nesting place – in the white-hot belly of this star.

As we continued a very long way through the star the dragon said to me, “Our next generation…. They will have their birth at the beginning of the next time”. And so as we flew by them I spoke into existence a benediction for all the dragons’ offspring there.

Suddenly we splashed out of the star looking outward into dark space and again we flew for a long time. When we rejoined the armada, coming alongside us I saw the Gatekeeper standing on the back of a dragon like it was nothing at all. Smiling at me, he passed by and was gone.

When back with the armada I asked the dragon if there was anything they needed and it answered saying, “We [require] justice”, and I promised it, “I will remember”.

After awhile, suddenly the dragon banked steeply rolling left into a dive. Very quickly the atmosphere took on a powerful roar about us, yet it was nothing to the dragon.

Once lower in F27 I had a great view of the whole range there and watched our approach as we began a gentle glide descending into the craggy alpine mountains and the hanging valley where my SP is enwalled within the buttress. Slowly the dragon swept low and then slowed more approaching my SP bringing me home.

After the creature left I entered my SP; the same wandering walk toward the end of my table to face the window with Raphael as he said to me, “Well. That was an entrance…..”. The two of us again just looked outward, waiting.

Thursday AM Session 1 F(49)

This was very unusual. When I got to F27 I found myself appearing at my old soul-retrieval site. Why am I here I wondered, but then I saw my old roommate B who died in recent years.

He was walking up the gentle grassy slope toward me appearing in his previous Earthly form. I saw him transfigure into something beyond understanding and leave this place. Why would he be back here now I wondered?

When we were face to face he said to me, “You shouldn’t be asking whether this is real or true. Right now you know it’s about not striving with this. You need to accept this. Focus on the messages. It’s gonna be like this for a long way”.

After being together some moments, seeing his face clearly, he vanished. Nothing else followed in this session and after this the remaining sessions in the course were all completely dead, but I was happy.

The end of Starlines 1 (Oct 2019)

See: Come Be with Us (November 2019 … )