Weigh it in the Balance (Feb ‘19….)

Weight it in the Balance: Feb 11th 2019

d.

7:00 PM (4hr 24m LST) Excellent to Optimum Earth Shielding. Solar wind: 5 protons/cm2. Flares: A0

Gone 75 minutes. Manual (non-hemisync) meditation.

This was an off-the-cuff meditation. For awhile now I’ve had no idea what I could possibly say to Those I Know so I haven’t tried any meditations. However, I have had some interesting sensitivity with my stones in recent weeks (see: Feel the Stones) and as psychic conditions should be good I thought I’d try a meditation and see where it might lead.

I pressed thru my mnemonics¹ slowly and methodically taking time in each focus-level to take note of any perceptions but nothing was happening at all – looking to be a dud.

As I pressed through each level I repeated my affirmation: that I am only open to those that are true, valid constructs, that which is free of deceit or guile. I don’t know that these affirmations actually insure anything but thought I’d implement them just in case they do.

It seemed it took a longer time then usual to make it to F27. Once there I paused, sorely regretting that I didn’t think I could go anywhere here that would yield answers to my questions. Could I go to the Library aspect or could the TBs (Tall Beings) help me with these questions? I don’t think so.

I decided to go to my SP27 and there too I found nothing apparent at all². It was mostly blank but as I stood looking out the crack that fashions the window in my SP a large shadow passed by and I wondered… a dragon? I doubted that given how vague things were but then I was aware of enough activity outside that I decided to go back outside to see whether I could see anything.

There was a sense of motion; very large motions. Then one dragon appeared to hover and perch before me while another appeared to be anchoring itself; clawing its grip into the mountain buttress that is the face of my SP27 home. There was at least one more hovering. I did not address them as I couldn’t decide whether I believed anything was actually there; the images were just too subtle. How can I trust these faint images?

I spent several moments working to convince myself whether this was baloney or not and since there was no communication I decided to continue on beyond the ELS (Earth Life System). Then just as I was about to leave the three dragons gathered together and came to perch directly in front of me as I stood on my portico looking at them. They just look at me making a distinct impression. I paused and wondered at this, but again since there was no communication and the images were vague I was reluctant to engage anything I was uncertain about and so I left.

I used the sling-shot maneuver to proceed and when I got to where I typically utilize my F42 mnemonic on my door at AS³ suddenly my mnemonic appeared with brilliant clarity before me. This was startling as usually I have a hard time accessing my mnemonics as it’s difficult for me to produce them at will; to produce them visibly in my mind’s eye.

I generally can only glimpse them for fractions of a second, loose them, then keep trying to reacquire them; repeating this process until they’re clear enough for me to latched into the respective focus-level. This typically requires considerable concentration at the shifts but now the appearance of my mnemonic was brightly vivid, solid, freely available to me. As I looked at the mnemonic I was surprised to see that I could see through the mnemonic and beyond into… the City of Light – as I call it ⁴.

The City of Light is the F42 harmonic of the Elohim City encountered via F21 back when Raphael first began to take me there⁵. Of course the City spans more than that. F49 is where I first saw The Twelve Pillars: The Complete Intension and Purpose of The Ancients⁶. The City also access Beyond those levels.

I’ve only been there a couple or few times; never quite able to get back to it. As I considered this actually was the City of Light something with great clarity said to me, “This is where you wish to be. Is it not”?

Startled, I realized that… that was indeed true. It is something deep in me, something I’ve been thinking about for over a week; actually always, how to get back.

I pass through my mnemonic and as AS disappeared behind me I enter the City and found everything was brilliant. I wandered in on what seemed to be a vague path and considered I was deeper in the City then before, or at least I’ve never been here before so to speak.

As I recognized all this I vividly saw a park bench, as if it was burned into my mind. The bench was reminiscent of the chapter call “Oneness”⁷ in earlier collected notes about the Ancients but this was not the same place and not the same bench. That made sense because at that earlier time I accessed the Elohim City via F21. Now, as I stood looking at the bench considering the situation for a few moments, that everything was so brilliantly clear and apparent, I wondered that there was no one here to meet me and so I sat down to wait.

As I sat I noticed before me a small rise or something elevated and then I saw hovering before and slightly above me numerous elongated lights, like elongated streaks or slivers of light mixed together in all orientations, scintillating and alive. I really couldn’t tell exactly what it was. It was like looking at the glare of light streaks all mixed together and circulating in a cloud, is another way to describe it.

At the time I didn’t know what to do or what to think of this; it was so different from previous experiences, but in the sense that it was so vivid, so strongly contrasting with all my dud meditations, there was no doubt about this perception.

Then I heard something from among the lights say to me, “Speak”. The rest is very hard to describe or explain because it was so ineffable but I can say the conversation was structured like this:

“How am I to understand, to know which parts are true – of all these experiences? Why did you do this [create such confusion]? Should I suspect this whole City is false, that my own sister and mother, that they are false? Which parts are actually true? Though I know parts of all this are true, of all the other parts – which are true? This is unthinkable. Why do this?” I spoke out. To this all They would say, but They said it quite clearly was, “To teach you patience”.

I strained to discern, to identify what this scintillating light cloud was? Wondering who or what I was communicating with. In an instant They stated, “You – know Us”, but now I could not comprehend Them as if this was another presentation of Those I Know. At this time I both did but also did not recognize Them; this new presentation in whatever level or state this is.

I tried to sense Them more fully, to make sense of it, and then I realized, “I feel… contact… [now]”. To which They retorted, as if correcting or clarifying for me, “We have never been out of contact (which I recognized was true)”.

After a time of pondering Them I asked, “How do I understand this (all the above mentioned)”? They immediately replied, “Weigh it – in the Balance”. I wondered what that meant. How do I do that I thought [these matters]. They instantly replied to my thought, “It is a mystery…. not for man [to have], but – you… are not of man”. I waited for clarification, nothing more was added.

I was confused that there was no explanation. Why tell me about some “mystery” and not tell me what that is? What are They talking about I wondered so I called out, “Then would you not reveal it?”, but They offered no reply.

I pressed, “[Now You] Speak”, and when I again got no reply I thought for a moment and bluntly challenged, “Is it because You cannot or because You will not [reveal it now]?” They retorted forcefully, “[No] We must not, for that – is predestined for its time”.

Then I became exhausted. It seemed it would take forever to extract any answers out of Them – whatever “They” are. I began to phase in and out of C1 and F42/F49 as the fatigue became irresistible and just before I fell out of F42/F49 They loudly called to me saying, “Weigh it – in the Balance.” and I was suddenly back in C1.

In C1, thinking about all this I wondered, what in the world was that?! There is however, part of me that knows. I do know what’s going on, but then I consider how incredible it is. How can something like this possibly be?

Yet, I finally did get back and They did tell me more which in itself is a big step forward. The contact was a very strong connection. That is beyond doubt. I am less confused as if the understanding is actually simple? Maybe I am finally realizing I have to recognize this is going to take a long time, this lifetime, millennia. How does one embrace such comprehensions that are so far beyond one’s normal mode of existence?