The Dead


By mid-November 2014 I had completed all six Wave sets that comprise the whole Gateway Voyage CD course at the time. The sixth set introduces the student to focus level 21. What focus 21 might be is the region that is the limit of a living human’s supra-consciousness capability in general – loosely speaking. I think that is a suitably vague, yet a descriptive enough explanation for F21 for the moment.

Resuming the story, I remember reading somewhere that Bob Monroe said most all visitors to the Gateway Voyage course have some sort of profound experience in Wave 5 or 6. When I started working in focus 21 I found it did have another distinct sense to it but that too was elusive.

At first focus 21 produced nothing for me. In general, other than focus 10 and 12, I found it was hard to know what state I was in and, unfortunately again, it seemed like nothing was happening at all in this new F21 environment.

Then on November 15th I was getting ready to repeat one of the free-flow focus 21 tracks. The previously sessions were mostly failures, but this session was immediately interrupted with the appearance of Raphael. I had not seen him for awhile. As before he appeared standing directly in front of me, quite close – face to face – as he said to me, “We got work to do”.

In general I’m cautiously mindful to not add or created any imaginative structures in these experiences and so I benignly register what Raphael said, intending to not read into what he said nor pursue a meaning of what he meant.  After he said that the narration happened to be progressing from focus 12 to 21 in the background and at that time I became aware of a number of entities (I had no idea what they were) were gathering around and behind me.

A moment later many more of these “things” arrived and they appeared to be gathering behind me, as if to lift or push me or something. When they did that I found myself accelerating forward through what seemed to be focus-levels.  In a short time we arrived at what I thought was focus 21. We stopped and waited.

At that time in this particular track the narration explains there are loving individuals from the “other side” that have an interest in meeting and or helping one. Since I had been working with this track for awhile and nothing had previously happened I thought to myself, “Ok, sure – let’s see who’s there”.  So I called out a hello. Nothing. I decided I should give it more effort and so I called out again and then – there was my decease aunt and uncle.

I was absolutely astonished! They were so happy to see me! I was just utterly amazed. My aunt and uncle lived about one block away from where I grew up. They didn’t have kids of their own and so they adopted two girls. I recalled my uncle took a particular interest in me, in his own unique Bohemian way, so seeing them standing there slowly began to make sense to me.

Face to face with my aunt and uncle I noticed my recently deceased mother was not there which was fine with me. My aunt and uncle acknowledged that. I asked where my dad was and they had a more serious note (to be explained later in my late November note) but being there together, with my aunt and uncle was just – unexplainable joy – to meet them after all these years.

I can’t describe the magnitude of this amazement nor the powerful of the experience. I understood my uncle had been waiting all this time since he had passed; to see me come across to the other side1. Apparently I’m arriving early.

Then Raphael, who was still there, advanced to be the central figure. I understood he wanted to take me somewhere else. He turned to face me. He extending both his arms and so I took both his arms in turn, forearm-to-forearm, and he began to pull me upward.

Again this felt like the near sickening pulls I had experienced with him in focus 15 but after some moments I felt a bit better with the transition; it felt smoother or I was getting use to it.

As Raphael was pulling me higher he would periodically look at me as if to check how I was doing. At one point the feeling became very intense. The rate he was pulling was all I could take and when he checked me I called out to him to just go for it, that I’d hang on somehow to whatever this phenomena is. I was however, at my limit which is hard to explain outside of our physical notions.

Eventually we got to … to where? A state? A place? I have no idea where or what it was that Raphael had brought me to. We stopped and just stayed wherever we were for awhile.

Then the narrator interrupted stating it was time to exit; the hemi-sync dragging me back. I had a sense of descending and in time we came back to the place where my aunt and uncle were waiting.

There were so happy! In my whole life I had never had anyone that truly cared about me as far as I could tell; most care about themselves revealing their true self-interests eventually and so it was quite moving to see how they felt about me; that they were there; that there was at least someone who did really cared.

As Raphael and I were leaving I found I had actually begun to cry and why would I cry at that time? Well, it was because I had never in my life seen anyone so utterly joyful; never seen anything like this. It was completely overwhelming – seeing it.

In this CD track one is talk back down – back to normal consciousness (called C1 in TMI speak) – by the narration. It can be quite annoying as it is sometimes a very long count down. At this time however, I found it was very hard to come back to this World; difficult to get down to focus 12 as I needed to make a real effort to detach myself from that environment or whatever that place is, and so at this time the narrator’s counts down was very handy.

Overall it was a very profound experience that in a way took some time to recover from – the emotional shock. The above hardly describes it adequately. There is just no way to describe this to someone who has not been beyond.

  1. I grew up in a broken violent home. My father was an epileptic alcoholic shell-shocked WWII veteran. He was not a violent man. He shot himself through the head when I was 13 years old but lived to vegetate in a V.A. cuckoo’s nest. A secret kept until my aunt and uncle died was that my mother called my uncle that fateful AM night as she was worried my dad might make good on his promise – he’s worth more dead than alive. My uncle came to our house to reason with my dad; the two struggled over the gun and my dad was shot. My dad died when I was 18 years old and thank goodness that was over. There was plenty of death going around those years. The younger brother of a guy I knew from grade-school was shot to death by one of our high-school teachers. Another guy I knew since grade school that I rode my motorcycle with was killed in a bike wreck; his passenger was killed with him. Then one of my neighbors (a grown-up) was nearly beat to death by The Outlaws; he didn’t know his own name after that. Another guy I knew casually was killed on his chopper. Later a high school guy I hung out with was shot in a White Castle drive-thru and died in the ambulance.