May & June 2020
Many meditations, but they led nowhere or the encounters were so faint I can’t accept them.
However, at the end of June in the evenings I wondered … am I’m seeing futures? Something has changed these last few days. I’m able to allow myself to trust at least the First Ones and some others. I’m more relaxed. My attitude is better. But why direct me to return and then make that so difficult?
July 16th, 2020 (Slumgullion Pass)
It’s a cold rainy day up here. As I looked out my back window I thought this would be a perfect moment to see a large deer or elk; as if I saw it happening. But of course there was nothing there. Then, no more than 5 seconds later, I saw a large deer walk by, just the way I imagined it. Is this seeing futures? It happened as easy as that.
This evening I did a hemi-sync meditation and though I had no contact one thing was enunciated clearly, “Have faith”. This thought appeared as strong as if spoken to me and the perceived thought had the property of being a point of light. It also contained a compressed notion that I just glimpsed. This was definitely not my own thought.
But I ask, have faith in what? Have faith that more trouble, injury, pain, and mystery will be tossed my way as has been the case my whole life for the sake of some greater purpose? Have faith in exactly whom, and to do exactly what?
Yes there have been many incredible things in these experiences, some too impossible to believe, one that was false. I’m told to weight it in the balance. What progress has there been in determining that? So again I ask, have faith in what, and to be what?
7/22/2020 (Rio Grande Headwaters)
This morning when I finished calling the Spirits suddenly I realized the Presence of the Light1 was with me although I was in C1. She said to me, “I am with you – now”.
At that instant, from it’s nest over 300 yards away, an Osprey took flight and flew toward me. I watched as this bird flew directly to me. When it arrived it flew around me three times, not 20 feet above me, making tight circles; close to me. Then it flew straight back to its nest.
Again I am reminded, I can count on the Presence of the Light to intervene.
Outside I heard: “Come be with Us”, and I thought I’m not going into mediation to only find nothing results from this whimsical cliche of a thought. So I sat outside hashing over this question of trust. How do I balance these conflicting thoughts without knowing the truth of them? I’m told to weight it in the balance. And it has been said”, There is no balance without truth”. So what do I make of all this?
[Trust – that We will guide you through].
This morning I called the Spirits. I submitted a request to them; that the smoke of the smudge be empowered to carry questions, answers, and blessing for all those that use the smoke; that attention be given to the Native American reservations.
I looked up and again saw the osprey leave its nest in the distance. It flew straight toward me. When it arrived, again it flew overhead circling closely around me three times. Then it returned directly to its nest. What does three represent?
I feel like a weight has been lifted off of me. I’m beginning to see things differently. I’m more able to stop struggling with this.
There is however, one obstacle and hinderence after another and this has made it clear it’s about patience.
Aug 24th, 2020
This afternoon I wasn’t doing anything in particular when suddenly – something siezed my mind’s eye and then I saw Anosh2 standing in a dell on her planet I believe. I saw her clearly; standing there, looking at me. There was a soft light giving the impression it was evening or morning. Would that be moonlight on her planet? She was looking at me, calling me.
It was so clear, so real, and then the vision was gone.
September 13th 2020.
I’ve been practicing a lot with hemi-sync in recent weeks and I’ve also been very sick; we’re going back to this? Meditations had been going nowhere but today in F21 I suddenly felt or saw that Tellaidian3 was aware of me. Was I sensing him? This was most unusual? Was that actually Tellaidian? This encouraged me to continue hemi-sync retraining.
Also recently while in F23 for a few moments I was able to see. Uncertain how much to believe but these were not memory loads.
In F42 today at my suite I wondered what the memory room would yield. I hadn’t even opened the door when those from the central galaxy and globular cluster region that created AS were present. It was amazing. Is it possible?
Sept 14th, 2020.
F42 hemi-sync. I thought I’d try going to my F42 meumonic at the White Wall to access the City then use the F42 mnemonic to go to AS. I spent considerable time focusing on the mnemonic and gave up as I was having no success. I stood just outside the Wall considering what to do next.
Then I was aware of Hera, my mother, and the Presence of the Light. They stood together on the outer portico of the Hall. I wondered what was really happening.
Hera called to me to come visit but I explain I can’t get there. She encouraged me to try rather then have Them bring me there. Making the effort, I was surprise to find that I was consolidating with Them.
Standing with Them I found Hera on my one o’clock, my mother to the right, the Presence central, and the Oracles of the Light on my left. We greeted each other and had misc conversation.
Then the Presence turned to lead me up the staircase to her porch. I quickly found I was with the Spirit of the Light. The Presence became a background figure as my conversation was with the Spirit directly. There was basic discussion about my usual questions but the thrust of the conversation concluded with – the Time has not yet come.
I returned my attention to the Presence and asked why they are using human forms in Their presentation? What is Their actual form? She explained the forms are symbolic. Clearly They are in no way human; utterly something else. This was a strong clear feeling. I did not get an answer as to exactly ‘what’ They are.
I wondered whether having a sister and a mother was some contrived presentation and the Presence explained that those relationships are authentic in the energy domain; that I am spawn from this mother and Hera is a sibling in this process.
After that there was a deep contact with Them and an strongly impressed assurance that was much stronger then I’ve sense before. It was so abundant, clear, an unmistakable intelligent personal contact.
When I felt it was time to return, as I turned looking out over the City, a bright light appeared to my right on the portico. I recognized it was a return portal. I walked into that light and found myself back in F21 in the forest area just outside the Green Wall. Then I saw the moonlight-like portal hovering. I entered that and found myself back in C1.
This was a very strong experience.
Morning (Utah desert): Calling the Spirits. A sparrow lands at my feet.
Morning (Utah desert). Calling the Spirits: the Sky People; the Star People. The sparrow returns and fluttering over me touches down to land lightly on my head then flew off to land on my right shoe.
Morning (Cibola Nat. Forest). Calling the Spirits: When addressing the Star Spirits a crow arrives flying from south to north across from me. I try to call the crow spirit but think that’s dumb. Then the crow turns its flight, a 90 deg turn, and flies directly east to me; about 150 feet. When it is directly overhead it turns about 90 degrees and resumes its flight to the north.