First I apologize that have not added more of my notes to early period. I guess it doesn’t interest me as much as the later times. Someday I’ll add more…
How it began…
I was in the hospital 2014 with a type of heart attack that is said to kill the patient outright. It surprised both myself and the cardiologist as there was nothing found wrong with my heart. Although I felt like I got hit by a truck I never thought at anytime that I wasn’t going to be ok and never believed for one moment that I was in any danger – sometimes I just know these things.
While in the hospital’s ICU I started having the most alarming hallucinations. Anytime, and only when, I closed my eyes even for an instant, I would see another reality in perfect clarity1. It was actually difficult to allow myself to look at these images because they were so uncanny; images that were completely clear and vivid and always there whenever I closed my eyes. This left me in a very alarmed state and I became more alarmed by the visions of this other reality then by being nearly killed, landing myself in the hospital.
I demanded to know what medications the nurses gave me but they just look at me puzzled as they didn’t know what to say. As my sense of alarm grew I came to the mind-set that I could not go on like this. What would I do when I need to sleep? It was too much to consider living with.
By evening I was moved out of ICU and once in a quiet room I decided to face this and see where this would go. So I sat up on the edge of my bed deciding to allow whatever this was to take over. I closed my eyes and immediately – I was launched out the window of my hospital room. I found myself hovering in the air just outside the high-rise hospital building. Being extremely startled by this I immediately returned to my room greatly relieved to find myself back sitting on the edge of the bed and thought, that’s a hell of a thing. I sat there for awhile wondering what this meant. What is this? I can’t stay this way I thought with heightened alarm but I thought I would test it again, so I closed my eyes.
Then in perfect clarity and presence of being I found myself just off the coast of Maine, is where I thought I was judging by the appearance of the coastline and trees. It was dark; there was some moonlight. I apprehended that I was approaching the trees from a point of view of just off a rocky shoreline, over water. I felt myself involuntarily swooping down toward the trees, then slowing to entering the tree branches with perfect silence. With precise coordination I passed into and between a couple of branches noting the rich color and detail of the leaves and branches in the dim light – absolutely incredible – being there. All this was in perfect clarity, totally real, as I came every so slowly to land lightly on a branch. I opened my eyes and I was instantly back. I understood that I was in something else. I just knew it – seeing through a birds eye’s. It was all absolutely vivid and completely real in every sensation.
Relieved to be back I was finally able to relax since I knew I could get back to normal and so eventually I did go to sleep; if such a thing is possible in a hospital. The next day when I woke the new capability was completely gone.
When I got back home from the hospital I called my old friend ‘B’ of many years and told him what happened in the hospital. We attended the same university when I was an undergraduate (he was a graduate student in Philosophy); we shared an apartment together. When I described to him what happened ‘B’ said to me, “Bill, you were having out of body experiences”. I had never hear of this before and had no idea what he was talking about but I recognized the truth of what he was saying. ‘B’ directed me to checkout Robert Monroe.
Doing that I discovered The Monroe Institute (TMI) and began to read one of Bob’s books2. I learned more about Bob Monroe’s Hemi-Sync technology, a mixed binaural audio system trademarked by TMI which Bob founded. Along with that I learned of the Gateway Voyager CD set and determined to find out what this was about.
- Some years later I’ve come to understand what it was that I saw and it would have been in what TMI calls focus 21. ↩
- When I began to read one of Bob’s books I immediately stopped reading it. I recognized the potential there was to influence my concepts and thinking by reading his book. Somehow I knew to not read his experiences. ↩