N:8
In my late October into early November sessions, while in focus-level 12 (F12 for short), I become aware of three figures that would appear facing me; standing together, shoulder to shoulder. They would stand in this manner in the same place in each session. They always stood just off to my right, about on my 2 o’clock and something like 10 to 12 feet away if one may judge distances in that environment.
These individuals appeared as vague white ghostly human-like statuette shapes. It seemed they were frozen in time or something like that. I couldn’t figure out why they looked the way they did. I was never alarmed by their appearances during these many sessions but I was puzzled as to what they were, what this meant.
In these appearances the figures did not move neither did they speak to me. In time I began to feel they represented something more than just some ghostly spirits or whatever term one may attempt to use. I sensed they represented something beyond all of us as their silent motionless statuette-like presence carried a sense of authority.
I could feel from them something that I can only categorize as a deity-like quality; whatever that is. I recognized this feeling could well have motivated mythologies in the past but I could not understand – whatever they were – why they appeared in his manner; facing me as they did.
Then one day a new figure appeared in my hemi-sync session. This individual clearly appeared as a man and seeing him was a vivid experience. He appeared just above me tho nearly on my level. He had long black hair, not quite shoulder length, that was swept back. He wore what looked like a long plain rough cloth shirt; maybe like a tunic shirt, but certainly nothing like what we wear now days. I would guess a shirt like that was worn at least more then a hundred years ago by something like the working class but I don’t know, this is just a guess. There were no adornments of any kind on that drab worn shirt.
He’s face is difficult to describe but I would describe him as having a serious, committed, and commanding countenance, yet he clearly had a humble disposition. I saw him in gray scale, no color, but with enough detail I could make out the expression on his face.
We conversed at length and as we talked it was clear he knew me very well; knowing my deepest questions, my deep grievances with life itself, and everything he said was, well – deeply comforting. He explained all my concerns were purposed, completely recognized, and fully understood. This contact was being made to serve as a reconciliation for all that has happened to me and I was satisfied with everything he explained.
Then the session’s exit narration interrupted. The narration and hemi-sync coding provides a sequence that regrounds the individual back to normal consciousness as the end of a track approaches. As this was happening I found myself receding, as if slowly falling away from this figure. As I felt this, recognizing the odd sensation of being pulled away, I looked back up at this newly met figure and then he called down to me saying, “Raphael”.
That surprised me because from the little bit I read of one of Bob’s books it seemed Bob like to refer to entities he met with acronym designations so I instantly took noticed of this difference. I wondered why this figure was giving me a name. Who could he be?
Later that day, back in the physical as we say, I thought to investigate this name on the web and found may hits that referred to – the Archangel Raphael. This seemed totally absurd. How could I possibly have spoken with an archangel, and even if he actually was an archangel, why would “I” be meeting one?
Then I noticed the name Raphael meant God Healing – something I’ve spent most of my lifetime looking for as I had previously lived 28 years with a crushing chronic disease along with other injuries and so I found I was caught between the sense that on the one hand this was complete nonsense – and on the other hand – this seemed to be completely right since I did have impossible healings in my life although none of the healing experiences occurred when nor how I would have liked.
The next day I went back into a F12 session. Instantly, the individual Raphael was there so I asked if he was “The Raphael” and if so could he provide some sort of confirmation that demonstrated who he was. He appeared perturbed by this; disapproving with me. I voiced that seemed like a strange reaction to a simple question. I said I didn’t think “God” would respond like that if asked …. and the individual instantly disappeared.
The session went completely dead and following this all my sessions were completely dead. That lasted for a couple of days. After that time and thinking about it for awhile, one day I entered a focus 12 session and called out to the space around me saying, “If – Raphael – you really are truly – “the” Raphael – I apologize”, and instantly he appeared.
Not only did he return but I suddenly felt and understood we were connected in some way, that there was a bond between us. I didn’t understand what this feeling was but it was clear to me Raphael and I had some deep connection.
In this meeting Raphael conveyed the clear understanding that the life experiences I had were needed for something greater than myself, something purposed. Here again, I did not fully understand what that meant.
The Energy Conversion Box
To understand the following sessions I have to explain an aspect of Bob Monroe’s method. In the TMI Gateway training and used in following courses there is something called the preparatory process. This process is a collection of tasks, routines, or rituals, one utilizes to help one prepare for the specific session. One particular step in this process pertains to utilizing what is referred to as an energy conversion box. I know, it sounds corny.
This is an imaginary box one creates for oneself; a mental construct if you will. This box serves as a receptacle for all the thoughts that may be an obstacle to clearing one’s mind for the hemi-sync session. At the beginning of each session one puts all the things that one’s mind is busy mulling over in the box; anything that may be a distraction during the session.
I would commonly put in the box pictures of family members, a small model of the building I work in, and other nagging feelings about various things. Again, the idea is to identify mental distractions and set them in the box so that one’s mind may be free of these intrusive distracting thoughts, at least during the time of the session.
My energy conversion box had the form of a large granite vault that rested on a wooden floor in a small room. In my sessions when I was done putting things in the box I would closed its heavy lid and slide the box out of the way to my right. That was my ritual. Then I would proceed following the narration.
However, in one session following the recent encounter with Raphael, when I was done putting the usual distractions in my energy conversion box I noticed on my left a gigantic balloon-like feature appeared. It resembled a partially inflated hot air balloon that was inflating and it was filling the space of my preparatory process room. The ballon was became an ever increasing problem.
Given the time allotted for the preparatory process I became concerned about what this meant and that there was no way I could gather it up and fit the expanding balloon into my energy conversion box. The balloon was completely unmanageable and I was baffled as what to do about it or what this meant, yet there it was, whether I liked it or not.
Then, in some manner I can’t explain, I thought to shrink the balloon and as I did that it turned into a heavy lead ball slightly smaller than a basketball. It was my goal to shrink the ballon but the turning into lead happened on its own.
In all the sessions the following days and weeks, whenever I entered the room that stored my energy conversion box during the preparatory process there would be this heavy object. It was always present at my feet and I would put this heavy object in the conversion box while I had no idea what it was or what I could do about it. I wondered, what in the world is this?
At that time I was learning focus-level 15 with some frustration. I was never able to get there it seemed – wherever there is. Then one day when starting my session, as soon as I closed my eyes to start the meditation, not even starting the preparatory process so the hemi-sync is only just beginning, I was surprise to find Raphael suddenly standing directly in front of me.
We were face to face. I hadn’t even settled into focus 10, the lesson narration hadn’t even begun, when Raphael stepped up to me, grabbed me by my shoulder, then turning around he proceeded to drag me off with him into the blackness. The strength of his pulls were like – like having one’s heart yanked out.
I felt sick from the what felt like excessive acceleration and this became unrelenting. As we traveled I heard the narration begin, as if far away in the distance. Soon it faded away in the background as if it was completely immaterial. Then I recognized focus-level 15 (I guess) or whatever it was very difficult to comprehend. It was clearly different from focus-level 12. Wherever it was Raphael had taken me I had strange body sensations like being smeared, or squashed. Mentally I felt like I was collapsing from 3 dimensions to two dimensions then to a point. Then, nothing more happened and I was returned.
Encounters like this one with Raphael went on for many sessions, over many days. I’d enter a session and Raphael would faithfully be there. He’d grab me and drag me off.
Nothing particularly happened in these sessions other than Raphael dragging me off and I would go through these sensations over and over again trying to cope or get use to whatever place or environments he was taking me to. I really have no way to explain it or where we went. For myself, if we were going to focus-level 15 it was something that was hard to grasp but I actually don’t know where Raphael was taking me.